conversions

I have a post dump file. Every time anyone posts anything to any page on corz.org, it gets dumped to this file. Everything.. comments, blogs, auto-spam, etc., basically any form input.

It usually gets deleted on a regular basis, its main purpose being to capture my in-progress work for possible later retrieval; should anything unforward happen to my connexion/web browser/computer/power/brain/etc. Occasionally, I have a scan through first; mainly to see what folk are converting.

I have a few handy converter tools kicking around the site; the most popular1 being "Tag Tools", which converts between php echos and HTML; There's also a cute text -> html tool, which uses the same bbcode-capable input as the site comments, to transform plain old text into beautifully styled HTML. Some of the stuff that gets pushed through these tools, well..

Firstly, folk commonly imagine that the php<>html converter can somehow convert actual php code into pristine html2, and will chuck entire php scripts into it. If I had a quid for every time I've read some fool's uploaded password, well, I'd definitely have enough for a good few drinks. But it gets a lot crazier than that.

Of course, I supply source code for these tools, and the on-site pages are merely demos. What I really want, is for people to download the php code, and run it at home. Obviously, my dream of a web server running in everyone's home is fantasy still, because folk routinely use these demo tools to convert everything from their latest web pages, to entire books..

In the dump file for just the last Twelve hours or so, I have a complete copy of "Beyond Good And Evil", By Friedrich Nietzsche; "Story of His Life", by Geronimo!; "Hamlet, Prince Of Denmark", by William Shakespeare; and "Eclipse", by Stephenie Meyer (that one's in Portuguese), and I haven't even scrolled all the way through, yet! Nuts!

Do they think I have unlimited bandwidth or something? Well, okay, I do, but that's not the point. And not only are they uploading whole books to convert to html, but doing so over and over, to correct spelling errors! Six copies of one of those books I got. SIX! If that was you, be clear; I will now refer to you as "King of Stupid". I don't want to impose limits, so let's not take the piss, eh!

Of course, There's also a shit-load of spam, which happily does not reach any of my actual pages these days, save for the odd hand-job (I hear spammers are now hiring literate Third-Worlders to get around Captchas - very clever!).

Of course, the dump script also records IP address, browser details and such, if I ever feel the need for instant retribution. I don't bother - there are scripts to deal with those.

So there you have it, insight into stupid for those that aren't already.

:o) The Writing Entity @ corz.org